tonight was interesting. Really random. First Jenna slept over the night before, which was fun, I fell asleep wicked early so I felt kinda bad. Then I picked up Sharon, made killer sandwiches, and played with Brendan. Katie laroo also came over to take some reflection pictures. I worked till 9:45, went to pick up some dunkin donuts for everyone and got paid for it, came home and randomly eric and katie showed up at my house. We sat upstairs at my brothers and eric decided he wants some TK's so the 6 of us and the baby went to get some food at 11:30pm didnt get home till almost 1am. Katie left and Eric stayed to play my brother in a game of madden.

And I thought today was going to be uneventful. I guess I was wrong. I wish that I was more open to doignt hings. I mean there were parties tonight that I could have easily snuck out and gone to, I could have thrown one at my house (my parents went away for the night) But I am to chicken. Well I probably would have done something like that if it wasn't for the fact that rihgt now my dad dislikes me a lot. I'm leaving for Puerto Rico in 5 days and i'm not willing to risk that on one night of getting caught doing something. I guess I am chicken or whatever you want to call it. I think to much. There is this one kid who always tells me that I have to live in the moment. I don't know how to do that, I think and I can't help that. I wish i could just do things spontaneously,a nd live for the moment. But the truth is I am chicken. I think way ahead, I think of long term concequences. I don't know, I am going to bed I can't think anymore it is exhausting me

then || now

2:05 a.m. || 02.09.03